In honor of the release of the 134th version of Planet of the Apes, I thought I might share my story of terror. It happened many years ago when I was in Bali to give a speech. My wife went with me and we stayed over a few days before I had to go to Melbourne on business. While at Bali we hired a guide and car for a few days to take us sightseeing.
He decided that we must go and see the "Holy Monkey Forest." Sounds good to me! So we went; little did I know I was going to become a main character in my own version of "When Animals Attack."
First off, the Holy Monkey Forest is an amazing place. There is an excellent story on http://www.myseveralworlds.com/2007/01/17/holy-monkeys/ about the temple.
The monkeys in the temple are called Balinese macaques. These are not the small and cute Capuchin monkeys you see in movies. A Balinese macaques is like a 2 year old child; both in weight and in mischief.
While walking around the temple (there are well over 100 monkeys) I decided to lean up against a wall (not part of temple). Being 6" 3', it wasn't a wise move. It put my shoulders just about even with the wall. Within seconds, the "attack" began.
Now you see pictures of mischievous Balinese macaques playing with people and jumping on and off them. This monkey didn't get that memo. He jumped and took a death grip on my neck, such that my neck had to support the monkey's weight. I am not sure what scared me more, the thought of being strangled or the thought of ebola from the toes digging into my back. (Yes, I know those monkeys don't carry ebola).
I must have looked like Homer Simpson in a struggle - fore dozens of guides and merchants decended upon me. It probably took less than 30 seconds, but felt like hours, to get the monkey off my back. I think they gave him peanuts or some fruit. (Isn't that positive reinforcement?).
Needless to say there was a great deal of inspection to determine if any skin was broken (on me, the monkeys can take care of their own). Luckily it was not. Instead of thanking the merchants for their help the words that came out were,"No, I do not want a wooden turtle," or something similar.
We made it back to our car and terror was quickly become laughter. I assumed my wife ran away to get help, maybe she just ran away! So we asked the guide, "Were to next?"
He replied, "Temple of the Holy Snake!"
No.
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